On his pain and “The Fault in our Stars”

Welcome to my journey from grief to life…I wrote this story 3 years ago and I am finally, at almost 5 years away from his tragic death, able to work with the words…to read them…to give voice to them.  Ours was a crazy, beautiful, imperfect love story that started in high school and ended decades later by no choice of our own.  I am choosing to honour him by telling our story and living and finding joy in now.  Join me.

PAIN! He was unable to communicate the extent of it with words – language was not his thing – but his eyes told the story and later his whole body would.  I was stunned by the language chosen by John Green to describe the PAIN of cancer (more on that in a bit).  My husband experienced PAIN that was so fierce that it was the 3rd partner in our marriage.  PAIN was the controlling, unrelentingly abusive spouse.